One of the biggest obstacles that keep people in their comfort zone is fear. Everything goes on locked down mode in your brain when you are afraid. We’re all afraid but you have to get to the point where you understand that fear doesn’t mean you can’t be brave. Courageous people are not free from fear, they proceed inspite of their fears and do it anyway. Fear by definition is an “unpleasant emotion caused by the threat of danger, pain or harm.”
For me, unpleasant does not cut it. Fear is a horrific, gut wrenching, crippling, sickening, and teeth shattering emotion that shows up when you’re attempting to do something new. However, fear is commonplace. To succeed in business or relationships or anything in life, you must have an unwavering, insatiable, tenacious courage and bravery. You have to be able to back yourself in; to harbor that kind of unbridled passion for winning that will stop at nothing until you achieve your goals.
When you feel fear, acknowledge its presence and ask yourself – what would the best version of myself do in this situation? Fear produces adrenaline and that has the potential to catapult you into superman mode. Face your fears or it’d choke your creativity, evaporates your promising ideas, imprison your mind and stops you from realizing your dreams. Personally, I had to adopt the mindset that fear is normal and that real failure is giving up without trying. My life got way better and I’ve kicked more ass since adopting this mindset. Feel the fear and do it anyway!
Dale Carnegie, the famous self-improvement writer said, “Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”
To win the war against fear, you have to start playing more often in your fear zone instead of avoiding it. There is no honor in staying average. Greatness is in all of us but it’s up to us to bring it out. The only way to live life to the fullest and bring your greatest contribution to the world is by shining brightly and expressing your talents freely. Do it while afraid and get so involved in the process that you’d forget you were scared. Whatever new project you want to undertake, fear will dissipates the moment you get the ball rolling. It’s magical! But if you hold back because you are afraid, fear only breeds fear. Action is the antidote for fear. Fear is an opportunity to get to know yourself better and be more in control of your actions and reactions.
Marianne Williamson said, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond imagination. It is our light more than our darkness which scares us. We ask ourselves – who am I to be brilliant, beautiful, talented, and fabulous. But honestly, who are you to not be so?”
If you are not afraid to fail then you’ve already won. To really escape fear, you have to go through it not around it. The ugly effects of fear goes beyond keeping you in your comfort zone. When fear takes over you, it locks you up in a self-defeating mindset and a perpetual mood for repeated defeat. You turn to look at life through the eyes of fear. You can choose to see poverty, lack, scarcity, deprivation and injustices or you can choose to see opportunities, abundance, success and wealth. What you see is what you get. A fearful person is often a negative person.
Take a look at this scenario, many people are afraid to go to their Doctor when they fall sick. They are afraid to do any kind of medical test. Some are afraid to write an exams. Some are afraid of heights or traveling in an airplane. Some are afraid of elevators at shopping malls while others are afraid of using lifts in tall buildings. All these are common fears people often experience but they don’t let it stop them from writing an exam, traveling or taking a medical test that could be the determining factor between life and death. So, don’t let fear stop you from pursuing and living your dreams! Feel the fear but do it anyway.
Fear do not pay the bills. Fear do not win any awards. The fear of what people will say has never stop people from talking behind your back. The fear of failure has never prevented anyone from failing. So, whether you do it or not you’d still fail by default. People will still talk about you whether you’re the richest, poorest, average or the most miserable in your community.
Do you want to be successful? Do you want to make a difference? Do you want to change your life? Do you want to build a better future for your children? If yes, then you should never surrender to the emotion of fear. Waiting for the right time will not eliminate fear, waiting only breeds more fear. Procrastination generate nothing but more fear. Yes, there is a mountain before you but waiting will not make the mountain become smaller. Feel the fear and do it anyway! As Hafez of Persia said “Fear is the cheapest room in the house. I’d like to see you in better living conditions”
By Nicky Verd
An excerpt from her new book “Disrupt Yourself Or Be Disrupted”